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visitors since May 12, 2002
May 27, 2002

Woke up this morning in the Kombi. I'd parked by the beach just past Anglesea. No one was around. The sun was shining. The waves were pounding. It was all very, very pleasant. I had a variety of things to do in Geelong, but I delayed my departure from this beguiling coastal scene as long as I could.

I curled up and continued reading James Gleick's Faster: The Acceleration of Just About Everything. I was amused by the contrast between the book's subject and the surroundings in which I was absorbing it. It's an interesting read, and it's a good choice for a relaxed day on the beach. It helped me appreciate being away from the phone and the computer and the net and the whole damn lobster trap of technology, and I was grateful for that.


Recently I had dinner with Flash, which was immensely enjoyable. We met up on a cold and rainy night. I asked her if she was hungry, and she nodded and said "yep. I could go food."

"Go food?"

That's what she said. I'm not making this up.

But wait, there's more. About thirty seconds later, when I made some reference to the unpleasant weather conditions, she nodded and said "winter is upon us."

I must admit, I like a woman who is capable of expressing herself across a wide verbal range. And she glided from comic abbreviation to poetic observation without any apparent effort, and she continued to be sparkling company for the rest of the evening.

This I also liked.

I'm going to let you in on a little secret. Flash is not her real name. Normally I don't explain the names I use, but I'm going to make an exception here. Her real name is Funny Little Aussie Sheila. I know I'm taking liberties by shortening that, but liberties are there to be taken. And this is one liberty I have every intention of taking.

Flash passed the Beautiful Woman Test.TM Boy, did she pass the BWT. Flash passed the BWT in a flash. It was all very impressive.

The Beautiful Woman Test?TM

Not much equipment is needed for this, apart from a busy road and the company of a woman. The test goes like this: you cross the road with her.

At this point it might be worth pointing out that I'm not claiming that this is a very sophisticated test.

As you approach the busy road, hover back. Let her take the lead. Observe her style. Does she ignore the traffic and walk straight across the road, or does she warily study each and every vehicle on the road, waiting until it's completely safe to cross?

If she walks straight across the road, then you're dealing with a woman who knows she's beautiful. Her behaviour, which may appear suicidal, is simply a reflection of her attitude of "they'll see me."

But a woman who genuinely believes that she's unattractive will cross a busy road like I do. Nervously. Watchfully. Carefully. She'll regard herself as invisible to the traffic, and will have use her brains and fear to get across safely.

Just for the record, when I crossed my first busy road with Flash, she got to the other side in no time. As a kind of encore, she turned and waved. Stranded on the other side of the road, I waved back.

     Posted by Sean Hegarty at 11:55 PM in the People category | Comments (0)
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